This book was a quick listen and easy to understand. The Art of Loving was originally published in 1956 and talks about how love is an artistic practice rather than a mere feeling.

A main theme in this book is that our society misguides us on what love actually is; we are usually focused on how we can be loved or how we can be attractive rather than on how we can love others. I am guilty of focusing on the former myself and I am happy that the book pointed this out to me. I think that a lot of my childhood trauma seeps into the way that I view romantic relationships. Like, I am stunted in a way that makes me look towards others to tell me I am good enough rather than having the self worth to get that from myself. I never got a lot of reassurance from my parents and I am now replaying this script of wanting others to reassure me in ways that I wish my parents would have.

I am happy that I am becoming aware of these inner workings and that I am able to put more space between myself and my impulses. This is actually the longest period of time that I have not actively been looking for a relationship. I would be lying if I said that it was easy. It’s actually extremely uncomfortable. I think that’s where the learning and work comes in though. I am proud of myself for continuing to learn about myself and to grow as a person.

Let me know what you think of the book if you decide to read 🙂