I desire interesting lovers rather than suitable lovers

I’m always chasing someone or being chased

I become unenthusiastic in the calm

Wanting what I don’t have

Resenting what is right in front of me

I’m broken in ways that I always pay for later

Like now, as I’m sitting here

Scheming my next romance

To run away from the realities that terrify me

From the situations that I create

I never know how to stay in one place

Back and forth but never centered

I wonder if I will ever be satisfied by a real person