Liability – Lorde

Lorde’s 2nd studio album “Melodrama” is one that I find myself coming back to time and time again. The New Zealand singer-songwriter created this concept album that tells a story of falling in and out of love in her early 20s. From scenes of dancing the night away with friends to having a romance worthy of being hung up in the Louvre, she paints vibrant pictures of the big feelings that come with being on your own for the first time.

Liability is a snap shot of what it feels like to get dragged down by a breakup and think that you’re unlovable.

“the truth is, i am a toy that people enjoy ’til all of the tricks don’t work anymore, then they are bored of me” – This is a common sentiment that I have found myself struggling with in my journey of dating and relationships. It’s easy to fall into romances with people who are just along for the ride of the thrill of it all, but then leave at the first sign of vulnerability or true intimacy. I have felt ‘boring’ or disregarded in relationships before and it really came from a place of letting others dictate my worth rather than it coming from within.

“you’re a little much for me. you’re a liability” – For those of us that struggle with mental illness on a daily basis, it can feel like we are a burden on others at times. I think that it’s important to surround ourselves with people who can truly appreciate all aspects of us rather than reinforce this negative narrative that we are a liability to them. Those kind of people don’t deserve our light, period.

As the album continues, we get to hear the more healing track to this story which is the reprise.

“but you’re not what you thought you were” – Lorde takes a step back and realizes that she isn’t a liability after all. She is a complex human that will continue to thrive past the narrative that she is the problem. It’s easy to think about ourselves negatively and to be hard on ourselves. The real work is in countering that voice with self compassion and self love. This is a daily practice for me and believe me, it’s WORK. To me it’s work worth doing though, because no one can truly know me or comfort me in the ways that I can. People are there to support me, but no one can fill all of my needs. It has to come from my lips that I am not a liability, but rather someone full of life and love.

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